“The answer is always ‘no’ until you ask the question.”
— James A. Scott, The President’s Dossier
The Story of Miira: A Lesson in Assumptions
Miira held a junior role at a fast-paced communications agency. She was sharp, dependable, and full of ideas—but quiet. In team meetings, she often scribbled brilliant suggestions in her notebook but rarely spoke up. When a senior colleague went on leave, the agency needed someone to take over a high-visibility campaign.
During our session, I asked Miira if she’d considered volunteering.
“Oh no, they wouldn’t pick me for something that big,” she said. “I’m too junior.”
“Did anyone say that to you?” I asked.
Miira paused. No one had. She had never even mentioned her interest.
Later that day, she asked her manager if she could help with the project. Not only was her initiative welcomed—it was exactly what the team had been hoping for.
She was looped into the campaign within a week. That one question changed the trajectory of her role. Over the following months, she was given more responsibility, new challenges, and eventually, a promotion.
Miira’s story isn’t unusual. Many of us talk ourselves out of opportunities before anyone else even enters the conversation. The fear of hearing “no” can be louder than our ambition. But here’s the truth: if we don’t ask, we’re guaranteeing that “no” ourselves.
Asking for something—an opportunity, clarity, help—is not a sign of weakness or overconfidence. It’s a sign of curiosity, courage, and self-awareness. The worst-case scenario? You stay where you are. The best case? You move forward in ways you didn’t expect.
Tips to Embrace the Power of Asking
- Challenge Your Inner Narrator
Ask yourself: am I assuming the answer, or do I actually know it? - Practice Low-Stakes Asking
Get used to posing questions in situations where the stakes are low—it builds the muscle for bigger asks. - Detach from the Outcome
Learn to see “no” not as rejection but as redirection or valuable feedback. - Make Curiosity a Habit
Replace “they probably won’t…” with “I wonder if…” and act on it. - Recognize the Win in Asking
The act of asking is a bold move. Celebrate it. Each time you do it, it gets easier.
We often tell ourselves stories about what we can or cannot have—without realizing we’ve made those decisions alone. Miira’s moment wasn’t just about getting a new project; it was about rewriting the script she had been quietly following.
So the next time you’re unsure, don’t assume.
Just ask.